The Ambivalent Anxiety of EDM – Algorithms & The Arts

What I Listened To

EDM. Electronic Dance Music… I have no clue how to start this, so I’m just going to say this before I get into the general structure: I despise EDM music. There’s so many things about it I dislike, but if I had to pick one thing about it, it would probably be that to me, EDM music doesn’t sound very musicy. You know what I mean? You can’t pick out an instrument MOST of the time because it all sounds so digital. I like music that I could listen to, go “hey I hear these chords in this time signature, so let me learn it on piano” instead of “I’m not paying $15/month to make digital club music that’s stupid”.

Okay that’s the rant – onto the website.

How I Found This Music

“Your primary task with this assignment is to experience an album in a musical genre completely outside your usual listening preferences. I want you to find an artist you’ve never heard of before that creates music in a genre you’re unfamiliar with”

Well damn. I immediately ran into an issue, since I listen to basically everything. From country to heavy metal to pop to rap, I have a playlist. I even have playlists for songs in other languages (shoutout my latinx playlist). Now there was ONE genre I refused to listen to, and surely I wouldn’t cave and go with it, right? …right?

I didn’t have it in me to make a decision willingly, so I used a random number generator and Googled “popular edm artists” and let fate choose my circle of hell. It chose 23. Now mind you I know SEVEN of these artists (Skrillex, Marshmello, David Guetta, Avicii, Chainsmokers, Daft Punk, Kygo), but the one fate gave me, number 23, I am SHOCKED I never heard of: Alan Walker.

How I listen to EDM

I really only listen to music on Spotify because personally, I don’t like to sit and watch music videos. For the sake of this assignment, I gave it a shot and it was ehhhhhh. Here’s the official music video to Do It All For You by Alan Walker and Trevor Guthrie – it really didn’t pique my interest.

So back to Spotify. I listened to the album Different World from 2018 because I know nothing about EDM and the color of the album was unique and appealing to the eye.

Ambivalence! (feat. Anxiety)

It makes another appearance! Yes! Now for those of you who haven’t seen my previous assignments, Ambivalence “refers to having mixed feelings about something, simultaneously experiencing both positive and negative emotions towards it”. Now how could I possibly have mixed feelings about something that I claim to loathe? Well there were a couple songs that gave me a somewhat, new-found appreciation for music on THIS ALBUM. I cannot stress enough that I still dislike most other EDM music, but take the song Lily for instance: I was almost captivated by the story being told through the lyrics while struggling to enjoy the EDM background ‘instrumentals’.

–Hi, future me here. Originally these lyrics were one continuous stream, however I’m going to break up some parts in between and provide little insights and comments either explaining my thinking or simply saying something about it. Additionally, I am giving the “anxiety” feeling more importance up here before the lyrics because I realize now that the Ambivalence is only about my issues with EDM, but when it comes to the actual song, anxiety is a primary feeling.–

Consulting MedilinePlus.gov, “Anxiety is a feeling of fear, dread, and uneasiness” and holy sweet baby mama is anxiety the right word here.

Lily was a little girl
Afraid of the big, wide world
She grew up within her castle walls
Now and then, she tried to run
And then on a night with the setting sun
She went in the woods away
So afraid, all alone
They warned her, don’t go there
There’s creatures who are hidin’ in the dark

The beginning of the song tells the tale of Lily being confined to the castle walls and one evening deciding to make a break for the woods. Now personally, I like to envision/visualize song lyrics and pages of books to give a story an additional level of engaging. Why just read/listen to a story when you can picture it in your mind and turn it into a movie?

After Lily flees into the woods, I imagine a voiceover while the woods give a sense of closing in around the girl for the words “they warned her, don’t go there, there’s creatures who are hidin’ in the dark” to create that sense of anxiety I so casually ‘featured’ in the heading of this section.

Then somethin’ came creepin’
It told her, “Don’t you worry, ” just
Follow everywhere I go
Top of all the mountains or valley low
Give you everything you’ve been dreamin’ of
Just let me in, ooh
Everything you want in gold
I’ll be the magic story you’ve been told
And you’ll be safe under my control
Just let me in, ooh
Just let me in, ooh

The chorus. In this section, the creature(s) in the woods beckon to Lily, promising her the world if she would just give up control of herself to them; to let go and let the creatures take over from here on. Now when this “somethin’ came creepin'”, I never imagined a real creature or thing, as I believe the fear of the unknown is significantly more anxiety-inducing than staring down a physical being. This section alone actually envokes that ambivalent feeling because deep down you know you hate the thought of losing control, but there’s also that part of you that wants to let go and to get “everything you’ve been dreamin of”. Do you let the creature take control in order to receive “the magic story you’ve been told”?

She knew she was hypnotized
And walking on cold, thin ice
Then it broke, and she awoke again
Then she ran faster and
Start screamin’, “Is there someone out there?
Please help me, come get me”
Behind her, she can hear it say
Follow everywhere I go
Top of all the mountains or valley low
Give you everything you’ve been dreamin’ of
Just let me in, ooh
Everything you want in gold
I’ll be the magic story you’ve been told
And you’ll be safe under my control
Just let me in, ooh
Just let me in, ooh
Everything you want in gold
I’ll be the magic story you’ve been told
And you’ll be safe under my control
Just let me in, ooh

I think this is my favorite part of the story despite the simmering hatred for EDM beneath the surface of it all. This is the part where the ‘reader’ of Lily’s story realizes that she’s in too deep now. She became hypnotizzed by the creature and was playing a dangerous game until she couldn’t hold on anymore, and “then it broke, and she awoke again”.

Picture this: Lily is now facing down the abyssal black of the woods, trembling and unable to move, when all of the sudden the darkness rushes her and she blacks out. She wakes up with the full moon overhead, and with no sense of direction, runs deeper into the woods praying to a divine being that someone will find her. The further she ran, the louder the voice got. The beckoning of relinquishing control and simply letting go.

It’s the same exact chorus with an even more anxious and desperate feeling now that the story has progressed even further.

Follow everywhere I go
Top of all the mountains or valley low
Give you everything you’ve been dreamin’ of
Just let me in, ooh
Then she ran faster and
Start screamin’, “Is there someone out there?
Please help me”
Just let me in, ooh

The song ends with Lily running deeper and deeper into the endless woods, crying out for help… and the only help available to her now is the creature of the abyss, promising the world in exchange for control.

Thank you Genius.com. Anyways, is that morbid? A little, yes. It was interesting to hear the story unwind, and that furthered my ambivalence because I both loved and hated hearing about Lily venturing out one night and then attempting to run from the creatures of the night hiding in the forrest trying to get her to succomb to their control. See what I mean?

How Algorithms Could Recommend This

That’s tough to answer because I wouldn’t necessarily WANT this recommended, but if it had to be done it could most likely be categorized as something like “club music” or “music with computerized feeling” or something along those lines. With Walker being such a big artist, people who enjoy this type of music would probably use him as an anchor point and find smaller artists based on who he makes collaborative music with and such.